Author and creator Hadassa Ben Ari has offered a rare and vulnerable look into her personal journey following her high-profile divorce from singer Hanan Ben Ari. In a candid interview with the HaDor leaflet, she addressed one of her most significant identity shifts: the decision to stop wearing a headcovering (mitpachat).
The Weight of the Veil
For Ben Ari, the headcovering was more than just a garment; it was a constant part of her identity since her marriage. "There is nothing like a headcovering - it possesses an nobility and beauty that is out of this world," she shared, adding with a smile, "for those who know how to tie it properly, of course."
She revealed that throughout her marriage, she rarely saw her own hair. "Like a good Sephardic woman, I only blessed and prayed while wearing it, so I only took it off late at night."
Beyond the Myth of "Freedom"
Contrary to the common narrative that removing a headcovering is an act of liberation, Ben Ari described the transition in terms of pain and loss. She noted that parting with her marriage meant a forced parting from the headcovering, a process she found deeply difficult.
"I didn't feel liberation; I felt insulted, disgraced, and ashamed," she confessed. For her, the sudden exposure felt like a loss of the "nobility" she had associated with the covering for years.
A New Reconciliation
Despite the initial feelings of shame, Ben Ari describes a gradual process of self-acceptance and a newfound appreciation for her appearance. This re-encounter with a part of herself that remained hidden for so long has led to a different kind of love.
"I love my hair today like I never loved it before," she concluded. However, she remains open to what the future holds, expressing a sense of curiosity about her evolving identity: "I’m curious to know how I’ll feel when I put the whole 'construction' back on when the time comes."
