Thank You, Brigitte: The Slap That Should’ve Come from Israel’s Foreign Ministry

Thank You, Brigitte: The Slap That Should’ve Come from Israel’s Foreign Ministry

In May 2025, Brigitte Macron did what millions of Israelis have been dreaming of for months and she did it effortlessly, with one graceful flick of the wrist. A light touch, a flick, a "tap" on the cheek of her husband — aka the President of France, as the two stepped off a plane in Hanoi. Harmless? Maybe. Symbolic? Absolutely. That slap ricocheted far beyond Vietnam, echoing straight into Israeli living rooms and group chats.

And while the French press scrambled to label it a “playful moment” or “marital tension relief,” Israelis knew better. That wasn’t a joke. That was diplomacy, the raw, honest kind you don’t get from press briefings or UN speeches. No wonder Twitter in Israel immediately dubbed her: “Brigitte Representative of the Jewish People.”

From High School Teacher to Global Truth-Slapper

Let’s not forget: Brigitte taught Emmanuel when he was 15. She knows how to discipline. She practically invented the art of the "educational slap." And now, apparently, she's applying that skill set to international politics. Because frankly, no one, and I mean no one, deserves a symbolic slap right now more than Emmanuel Macron.

He started off strong after October 7th, standing with Israel, condemning Hamas, calling for a coalition “like the one against ISIS.” But it didn’t take long before the transformation began: ceasefire demands, condemnation of Israeli airstrikes, talk of recognizing a Palestinian state without conditions, and, of course, the pièce de résistance, pushing for an arms embargo on Israel.

You tell me: if he doesn’t deserve a slap, who does?

One Slap = More Effective Than a Thousand UN Speeches

No UN ambassador. No viral tweet. No fiery Knesset speech. Nothing cut through the noise quite like Brigitte's palm grazing the President’s cheek. Maybe it’s time to replace our hasbara machine with a squad of French schoolteachers in their 70s tough, stylish, and willing to deliver swift justice with open hands and closed mouths.

Because what Brigitte gave us intentionally or not was a slap in the name of the south, the kidnapped, the reservists, and every Israeli who has to listen to Macron’s performative moralizing while sirens wail and rockets fall.

Macron, the Maestro of Moral Hypocrisy

Look, Macron isn’t an outright anti-Israel figure. He’s just your classic vintage politician: he says what sells, where it sells. One moment he’s mourning dead Israelis, the next he’s accusing them of “killing babies” on the BBC. All with that perfect Euro-smirk that somehow manages to be both condescending and clueless.

But when it comes to matters of life and death — especially Jewish lives — ambiguity isn’t cute. It’s dangerous. It’s cowardly. And yes, it deserves a slap.

Bottom Line? Merci.

So Brigitte - from the bottom of our weary, cynical, frustrated Zionist hearts - thank you. Thank you on behalf of the mothers in bomb shelters, the teenagers in uniform, the Jewish communities of France that feel abandoned, and the countless Israelis who’ve been quietly screaming at their screens, hoping someone would finally say: “Enough.”

You didn’t say it. You smacked it. And honestly? That’s better.